The Buddhified Podcast

#7: Outsmart Entrepreneur Overwhelm, ft. Jo Naughton Part 2

November 11, 2019 Season 1 Episode 7
The Buddhified Podcast
#7: Outsmart Entrepreneur Overwhelm, ft. Jo Naughton Part 2
Chapters
The Buddhified Podcast
#7: Outsmart Entrepreneur Overwhelm, ft. Jo Naughton Part 2
Nov 11, 2019 Season 1 Episode 7
Nicole König / Writer and Life Coach Joanna Naughton
A candid chat on how to decipher, outsmart, and overcome overwhelm.
Show Notes Transcript

“The size of your dreams must always exceed your current capacity to achieve them. If your dreams do not scare you, they are not big enough.” – Ellen Johnson Sirleaf

Raise your hand if there are days when your coffee tastes crappy, the cat keeps traipsing across your keyboard, or, surprise! Here's a client who decided to NOT pay your invoice.

Overwhelm has as many faces as it has triggers - and can feel like you're all by your lonesome facing yet another dragon, while virtually everyone else is out there living their best life --- complete with Instagram proof.
In reality, overwhelm is part of building a sustainable business, just like bookkeeping is: nobody gets where they're going without growing pains.

Join me and mindset coach Jo Naughton for a candid chat on how to decipher, outsmart, and overcome overwhelm.

***
Let's be podcast buddies!
If this episode was helpful for you, please subscribe and review and share this podcast with someone who might need it.

May the space between where you are now and where you want to be enlighten you.
Namaste.

spk_0:
00:24
Hello there. Welcome to the Booty Fight podcast. I'm your host. We call Chronic, and this episode focuses on deciphering, outsmarting and overcoming. Overwhelmed. I'm sure you've really listen to part one of my conversation with journal. So without further ado, let's jump right back in.
spk_1:
00:54
You know, easy on DH on kind of quick fix is generally not how these amazing transformations happen. So we kind of know there's got to be so
spk_0:
01:05
yes, it's called a path for a reason, right? Absolutely. I mean one thing. I really want a kind of stress here and kind of, you know, I want to say it again, and I want you to kind of say it again is that we don't have to suffer that. It's not something that comes from, you know, like a deity that comes into our heads, that we have to suffer and you say it wass crippling. And I can sew like I want to say, hallelujah because that's what it was for me. It was crippling and has suffered, and I felt like, OK, I have, That's the truth. So I have to live with that truth right? And that's it. And I'm suffering and I'm hurting and it's holding me back from so so many things. Andi, I could be happy was different. But that's the truth. So you know, that's just what I have to live with. And, yes, just not true, right? Absolutely not True. So I feel like if you're listening to us today, if you can take away one thing, then you know, press, rewind today and just listen to joke and explaining to you how that it's not the the voice you know that comes from the off cut off Never in your life. Storey. It's not a deity. It's not something you have to like, you know, bow too or or suffer for it, something you can control. Yeah, and you have the power here and it's a process, and it's hard work. And it's really like baby steps in the beginning. Like from person experience. That's really baby steps and kind of sink. Tell yourself No, no, no, no, no. I'm just saying, You know, you kind of catch yourself as you as you start hurting yourself again and you're inside your head. And yet call yourself to reason, you know? Yeah, but but it's baby steps In the beginning, you push it over the line, you go good for the orbit further and then it's It's so freeing, you know? I mean, Joe,
spk_1:
02:56
Absolutely. I mean so t give a bit more kind of just, I suppose, kind of background or information on it that if you think about the self talk that's in our minds, that self talk is then what you know that is, you know, our thoughts. So that self talk is then our thoughts. Our thoughts create our emotions and our emotions, then create our actions. So I think a lot of us feel like these emotions that we suffer. You know that word suffer, we suffer. These emotions just suddenly just happened to us for no apparent reason. You know, some external event happens and we respond with an emotion that's absolutely know how it works. Emotion only comes through thought. It is always thought that creates emotion. Now I understand why some people don't recognise that because they don't consciously hear the thought before the emotion comes. Yes, but the Connexion, Yes, Just because you don't consciously feel and all here or experience that thought doesn't mean you're not unconsciously experiencing that thought, and that thought could be so quick that you don't even notice. But ultimately that thought that that kind of self talk that you have around something is then going to create the emotion. So you are in complete, complete control, off generating emotions. So, for example, if we wanted to generate an emotion right now, you could do it. You know, we could decide you and I know Coulter, Tio, you think about something, you know, really sad. That's happened to us and to really think about that and feel it and on the self talk around it. And we could go into a deep, you know, dark emotion. Or we could decide let's chat about the the most amazing moment in our lives and less Remember that and create the thoughts and the self talk around that on on instantly, we would also feel that feeling off of happiness and joy in light. No grief. Yeah, absolutely. It might not be quite to the extent that we felt it in that moment that we're going back to, but well, we do feel it. We are absolutely in control of creating those feelings when we do it purposefully in our conscious minds on. So we need to remember that thought is a really powerful thing on now. Thought on that self talk comes from our beliefs. It comes from the things that we believe to be fundamental truth that, as we've already said, our not fundamental truth and it doesn't make you necessarily matter if the fundamental truth or not, because we can rewrite what our own truth is. And the crazy thing about most of those beliefs that are now, you know, generating our thoughts in our lives and therefore generating our emotions and therefore generating our actions. Those beliefs were most likely created before you were seven years old. Those beliefs were things that you took on before you were. Even old enoughto really make very conscious choice choices about your life on your own on DH. Therefore, how the hell come those beliefs be things that you really consciously chose to believe they can't be. Most of them are based on the beliefs on the talk on the actions of the people around you, parents, friends, piers, society, the media, whatever it is you've grown up around on DH, we've taken those things on sometimes based those beliefs on someone's based on tiny little things that happened. It may just have bean that, you know, the age of of two that we were in a room. Andi, you know, our mother walked out of the room and left us for a moment, and we felt like we were on our own on. We started crying on In that moment, this belief started that we weren't loved or we weren't good enough or we weren't safe for protected in some way it can be as tiny as that that then other events feel like they can combat compound that and suddenly this belief become such a fundamental truth inside us that our whole lives Khun, Khun passed us by without us really identifying that that is something that's been holding us back.
spk_0:
07:31
So you mean circling back to you know, the example you brought earlier that we are in a client call or, you know, convocation, whatever it is. And the claim says no. Yes, just business as usual, right? It just happens. It's Yeah, we have influence. Show does. Yeah, and And instead of going with the strange saying, OK, lesson release way like a sub. Consciously, of course, you know it's not a conscious thing we do, but we go back to that feeling off abandonment. Yeah, and feeling like we're not We're not worthy. We're not enough. And we alone we weird. Something's not right with less. And that's That's how it all starts to spin, right? Yeah.
spk_1:
08:09
Our mind wants to be ableto work everything out. Our unconscious mind particularly, does not like any gaps it doesn't like to know understand the meaning of something. So it will. It will create meaning and it will create meaning. As I've already said through generalisations often or by distorting things on dso something happens in our presence. So something happens right now, Like your client saying no to us on DH. Our unconscious mind immediately is looking for any sort Is Asian fella. Yeah, validation. Exactly. Any sort of similar things that happened in our past and what we attributed the meaning of that to be on DH. Therefore trying to tie everything up in a nice bow. Um, you know, it kind of feels when I say that like our unconscious mind is kind of against us. The one thing that we've got to recognise is that it really isn't. Yes, a lot off. The habits and patterns that it might have got into are not serving us, but ultimately its job is to protect us. Its job is to keep us safe and unfortunately, protecting us and keeping a safe will often be about trying to keep us in our comfort zone, stopping us from stepping out and playing big in the world. It could, you know, it can throw us things like procrastination and self doubt to try and just keep us just in our comfortable place on. It's really not doing that in in any sort of kind of mean or negative way. It's doing that through sheer protection. That is its job. And so our job in our conscious mind in the present moment is Teo too honest in unravel some of that to teach to re teach our unconscious mind in our body that I'm okay. It's okay. I'm moving forwards. I'm okay. You know, you don't have to worry. I thank you so much for trying to protect a but but I'm okay. I'm choosing to move forwards in this. I'm choosing to to recognise and be aware of the thoughts The self talk that you just sent me because I see that you're doing that to try and protect May. But actually, I'm going to choose something else. I'm gonna choose to believe something else on the more that you start to do that and talk kindly to your unconscious mind on DH and show it that that you're appreciative that it's trying to protect you, but almost teach it how to protect you in a different way. Protect me through allowing me to play big. Protect me by allowing May to embrace change on DH in growth on protect me by allowing metre Tio Tio embrace my genius and my my real power in life. As we said, it's a journey. It's a path is a process, but it absolutely can be done
spk_0:
11:08
So and this is something that I think I don't know. I don't know how to stress that because it's just after mind blowing thing is that it's not about fighting that you know that in a voice yes, about being appreciated and kind of working together to create your best life, right? Yeah. Yeah, Definitely not fighting that and kind of trying to, I don't know, like, overcome it or trying to kind of press suppress it, but actually to appreciate it for for what it does for us is try to keep us safe, right? But but saying Okay, let's kind of do this together almost right. Let me teach you how to help
spk_1:
11:46
me. Yeah, yeah, because we often our response to the negative voices in our mind is often to get cross with ourselves to get annoyed with ourselves and frustrated by ourselves. But the problem with that is is that that brings in more negative self talk. Yes. Andi, actually, what we want is we want to be able to bring in the really positive, empowering self talk. And therefore, we need to be able to kindly Saito our unconscious mind. Yeah, You know, I appreciate you. I appreciate you, but I'm gonna teach you how to do it slightly differently. I always like to think of our unconscious mind like it is a young child. So say, like three or four year old child who it's our job to kind of teach and model and show a three year old child that you know how we talk to people, how we interact with the world, how to be positive, how to you know how to do certain things on DH. We know that by shouting at that three year old child by getting crossed with it, although sometimes that might happen. We know that that's not actually the most powerful way to teach a young child to do something. We know that actually leading by example on DH on DH, you know, using praise as much as possible on DH, allowing for mistake. But then being their toe help pick someone up. That's what's gonna teach them well on. So one of the things I often do when my mind shoots me something that I think hang on, you know? Is that an empowering kind of self talk? Or is that Is that serving me or not? Is I? I talked to it as if it is a three year old child, so I will just say to myself in my mind, Hello, what you up to? And I say it exactly that way, Yes. I'll say it like
spk_0:
13:37
I'm talking to a
spk_1:
13:38
young child. Hello? What you up to? So I say in a very non judgmental way. I say it just like I would a three year old child who maybe is running towards May on DH. Potentially, they could be running towards May to give me a hug, or they could be running towards me to, you know, punch me in the shin like, you know, you never know on DH. So I literally just opened up that question of Hello. What are you up to in with? No judgement? Because I then want to just see Well, what is it up to? Is it about to lead me down a positive path, or is it about to lead me down a negative path on I allow it that opportunity. I mean, usually just by me asking that question If it has been something that was was limiting May or was gonna be negative self talk, it just kind of seems to suddenly disappear on. I suddenly can't even remember what it was that I was thinking. Whereas if it if it is something that will empower May, it just seems toe suddenly grow more energy. And I hear it even louder in my mind. So, yeah, maybe that's just something to try. We're all gonna walk around, you know, talking crazily to our three year old. Whether
spk_0:
14:52
it makes us better people if it makes us appreciate each other more on a lot of levels. Yeah, that's amazing, right? That would be good. Yeah, absolutely. You know, And that's one of the best ways
spk_1:
15:03
Tio, think about how we really should be talking to our own minds. And talking to ourselves is to think about a three year old child you absolutely love. Maybe is your own child, or I mean, to be honest, you know, some people with their own child, you can you can feel so kind of overwhelmed and you know, so much going on that maybe that isn't the best thing to do because, you know, often that can lead youto having to rush towards getting crossed or getting angry. But the one the person I always think that is, I have Ah, I've lots of nieces, actually. In one nephew on DH, one of my nieces, in particularly in particular, I think about how I talk to her and I imagine how I talked to her on DH. Then I think about making sure that I'm always talking to myself in that way, with absolute love on absolute kind of adoration on DH wanting to uplift her and wanting her to allow her to be the person that she really wants to bay and wanted to be as positive as I can with her on DH model to her. You know how I'm living my life in the most positive and uplifting way possible so that she can follow on DH. So if I imagine talking to her when I'm talking to my own self, then then that's a really amazing place today.
spk_0:
16:26
Yes, absolutely. So So for for us to kind of reflect on it could be something like asking, Okay if you picture the person you love most in the world Yeah. Would you talk to them that you talk to yourself inside your head, right? Definitely. I'm definitely okay, but that that's like that clashes and you have some self worth to do some crow fear. Yeah, way rules were
spk_1:
16:50
so hard on ourselves. Yes, on DH. Unfortunately, you know, we're hard on ourselves because we think we're not good enough. But then the issue is that by being hard on ourselves. Then we feel that we're not good enough. And so it just
spk_0:
17:06
we stand us in years gift. We haven't progressed. We have, right. It just continues in this
spk_1:
17:10
cycle. And we need to at some point, recognise We are in this cycle on. We need to work out how we get ourselves out of it on the way to get ourselves out of it is to recognise that self talk and then to slowly try and recognise, become aware of it, commit to changing it, to empowering yourself. Bye bye. Positive self talk and then to start to put the action in place toe, listen to all the positive empowering self tour.
spk_0:
17:40
Wow. Thank you so much for that. So we talked about you know what? Although one can look like for different people we talked about, um, from then on, to a narrow point of view, What anxiety over can look like fun. You know, you mentioned for fascination? Yeah, pasta syndrome. Um, what I what I really want to, like, get back to just a little bit. Is you mentioned not having a clear purpose and vision? Yeah, That can kind off if you don't have that goal that you work and walk towards that that can, you know, kind of give you all the inner turmoil you want right on. And I love how that circles back and connects to what we talked about Trade journal journaling earlier. And, you know, journaling and jet in general. And how both of us are gold centres. And you're putting it down on paper and a pen. Office walls. Yeah, And how that can help you to to just make that next best choice for yourself And just take that next best step. So leaving all that all of that leading to the question How have you personal, Reduced, overwhelmed in your own business. And what are some steps and some tangible things you can give us? Yeah. You know, to kind off in our daily lives practise to get out of that rat and to get into our best life for, you know, being kind to ourselves. All those things we talked about.
spk_1:
19:04
Yeah, I think, um I think, you know, you just really hit the nail on the head with the start of it out of of that really clear purpose and vision is is so crucial in being able to move forwards not just in our businesses but in our lives. And so particularly for entrepreneurs who have Teo work out how the work they do really fits into their life. And it's often in a very different way than maybe you know, other people with a with a 9 to 5 job might might have it. We need to know what we're working towards. We need to really see this greater purpose that we have in life and on the purpose ofthe this business that we are creating and building on moving forwards in on. I think within that one of the one of the things that always helps me with that and I know you and I have talked about this before Nicole is is knowing what my values are, knowing the things that really matter most to me. And so when I say values, yes, I mean those overriding things like, you know, family and friendship and helping people. But a lot of the work I do is about working with people to really get down to what the corps driving values are so getting even smaller on things like that. So for example, if you know if someone asked me what I value on what's important to me, I'm always going to say helping people that's massive to may. But to really, really start to get specific on that, I will ask questions about you know, what is it that that gives you helping people? What does that give you on? Actually, when we start to get really down to it, we see things like, Well, helping people gives me a sense of Connexion. It gives me a sense of purpose. It gives May a sense off, I suppose, significance and recognition in some ways, it gives, you know, all these different things on DH. So one of the things that has massively helped me is working with my own coaches to really get down to what my core driving values are. Those things that move me towards action help me to take action. And also that seemed to stop me from taking action in my life because something is not aligned to those values. So you know, it said to you earlier that when I listened to the meditation that I've created for myself, it's me repeating things like my values and my empowered beliefs. S o I I hear myself then saying these values and on DH, what I like to do is is I know you know, I have a massive long list of of all of my values and the things that seem to drive May. But I kind of like to get them down to what those real top eight are on. Dso my top eight values that I constantly repeat myself, our purpose, freedom, passion, joy, vibrancy, abundance, Connexion and growth on DH. So I constantly I'm checking in with those values. So I'm constantly repeating those to myself. Just as I work. I have the map on my wall on DH. When I start to feel like the anxiety is coming up a torture, I start to feel overwhelmed or I'm thinking something or I'm not sure where I'm going next. I like to just cheque him with those eight values because ultimately I know that if if I am fulfilling all of those eight values, then everything is is, you know, bloody brilliant. Everything is exactly where where I wanted to bay. If, however, any of those values feel like they're being drained by something I'm doing. Then I'm then you know, it's no wonder I will feel overwhelmed or I will feel, you know, something's just not quite right. So definitely knowing my values and my purposes is really important. And as I just said in that, the way that I've got to that is, yes, I've done a lot of work personally. Obviously I am a coach myself. That's what I do. And so I I
spk_0:
23:17
do a
spk_1:
23:18
lot off self coaching. However, when you're working with something like the mind, it's all well and good, me trying to use thes kind of tips and tricks in these different things that I know about the mind on myself. But actually, it's never gonna be quite as good as having somebody else to reflect things back, to ask the deep questions on DH. So I always have my own coaches. At the moment, I actually have have three coaches in different areas and having that support that real professional support guidance, having someone to ask the right questions so that I can continue to move forwards and keep kind of getting out of my own way is is it's super important to May. But then also all sorry, Nicole, but also the support as well, personally, to make sure that I am surrounded by by people like minded people. You know, people like you that I found either online groups or face to face groups of people. Or I make sure I spend time with those friends that really uplift me and light me up. I think that's a massively important part of the journey, particularly for an entrepreneur who is is doing something. Maybe that's different to the people around her.
spk_0:
24:37
Yes, well, you know, I could just say, How do you know? It's just It's just so I don't know. It's just just listening to you, just chatting with you. So my mother, because just bouncing off ideas. But sometimes we make so much use. So, like, strides talks when you want to go. Yeah, by working together and kind of evaluating, you know, the facets and our own way of looking at things right?
spk_1:
25:02
Absolutely. You know, business, business as an entrepreneur, often in businesses where maybe it's just us on our own, it
spk_0:
25:09
could be
spk_1:
25:10
really lonely. It can be Oh, yeah, you know, you can feel like You're the only one who understands kind of what's going on and nobody else around. You just understand. And sometimes, unfortunately, that is a little bit of the case. Yeah, you and I have talked before about the fact that the often the people who are closest to us people who struggled the most with the fact that we have taken this leap, that we're doing something different, that we've created something, um, that they don't quite understand and that can cause that can cause stress and worry for our loved ones for our friends, you know, they don't quite get what we're doing. And so we would hope that those people would be our biggest champions. And of course, we know that deep down they are. Of course, we know that they're proud of us. But also, um, we we need to recognise that as we've said, we all have different views of the world different different lens on on our reality on we all have different beliefs. So, you know, for example, the beliefs of most of the people kind of in my life really close to Mei is the belief that you know, you get a full time secure job on DH. You keep working in that full time secure job, and if you ever want to leave it, you make sure you've got another full time secure job. And I don't want to go ready to go on that, you know? So So even though, for example, you know my mom who is the loveliest person on the planet, Andi is super supportive and so proud of me yet because that is her fundamental belief. There is that struggle and that worry for her around what I'm doing. So even when I tell her about how super successful it is and how you know how amazing it it's, you know, my kind of entrepreneur journey is going there. Still, that little element of I kind of know if I if I showed up to tomorrow and said to her, Oh, I've decided to go back to full time employment She she would do actually breathe. Yeah, yeah, yeah, because that's that's what she knows based on her beliefs on. The thing that we need to remember is that we cannot change anyone else his beliefs on. That's a that's a big thing for me to say. as a coach because it might seem like that's my job to do that. It sure as hell isn't my job to change anyone else. His beliefs. It's my job to ask the right questions and to reflect stuff back so that other people can choose to change their own beliefs if they want to. But one thing we do have power over is our own beliefs, our own thoughts, our own self talk. As we've said,
spk_0:
27:52
I think one thing, maybe, to keep in mind when you when you start feeling like you know your abduct, you know, in your circle of loved ones is that we're the trader placers, right? So there were once I mean, it could be something as simple as me sharing. Oh my gosh, I'm so, so excited. Um, I wrote this. I want this newsletter and it's like the you know, the replies I got were so deep, and I if you're so connected to my subtract minutes and having his leg okay, yes, you're right and isn't getting easier getting any of them, which, but it's okay because that's me, and that's me being out there doing me. I'm It's scary and It's weird at times, right, and it's it's surest. How is a tonne of work? But But, gosh, it's so fulfilling it like it's it's me being me at my
spk_1:
28:47
best, Yeah, and that's why we have to absolutely make sure that the business is that we are creating is entrepreneurs are completely aligned to our values and our purpose and our vision, because it is really bloody hard work when even our closest loved ones, like our you know, our partners or our parents or kids or closest friends just don't quite get it. Then we need to make sure that we really do get it, that we really do know that this is worth it on. That's what I absolutely love about the work I do is that there is. There is no a second when I questioned whether this is worth worth it, because I'm so aligned to to what the vision off it is and what my purpose is that I am completely blessed to be able to do what I do. Oh, yes, no matter what anyone around may you know, might think about it, or or how they might be concerned about it. So
spk_0:
29:44
And I think that may be one thing that helps with the overwhelmed is to come back to to realising everything you do every single day you do with with the outcome in mind. Yes. You know, you ask yourself why Why, Like, why would they do this, right? Whatever. This could be the tiniest task. Oh, what you think about the outcome. You think about your not just your end. Big crazy, 10 year goal. But actually just okay, I'm taking this steps. It's another pebble on my path to where I'm going, right? Definitely. And you mentioned how How you know the connected value, like not not just being okay. I'm my value. Is joy right as value, but actually connecting that back. And what do I get out of it and combining that with your purpose? Your gift? Andi Also finding as an entrepreneur the oval of left between your gift, your purpose and also with Clay Meola. Between that and what the world needs from you toe. Then create something that not just, um, sparks happiness for you in that moment. Because you do you write. But I saw spark something that will nourish you body and soul, Um, including the bottom line, because we live in a world of money, right? So we have to catch that bottom line in mind at some point. But finding the overlap between what you're here for and what the world needs from you, we'll guide you towards the path where you create gift that outside yourself will be of value to other
spk_1:
31:16
people. Definitely. You know, it has to bring all of those elements together to make it to make it really work. And, you know, even some people might kind of feel like what they're doing or their vision isn't necessarily connected to, you know, some greater purpose in the world are trying to change something at massive level. But ultimately it will be to some degree. We're all inside us have this, you know, we all really do see that we are interconnected, as you know, as you know, everyone in the in the universe together and so and so that there's always gonna be some drive in us too, to help things for the greater good. Even if we haven't quite tapped into what that thing is yet. Yes. Now be in there somewhere
spk_0:
32:07
and everything is connected. Like everything we talked about today is connected to how you show up for yourself. How you show up for your business, how you communicate with the people. I love the term tribe, but I hate how sometimes it's used, you know, in market yams, because for me, it's just my tribe of the people who kind of see the universe in the same way. And we're, you know, we're kind of working towards the same save the planet, you know? You know, I haven't put it, but we're working towards the same, hopefully positive, ultimate outcome. Eso those people If you so so closely connected to Andi, I feel like everything is connected the way I I realised. I'm just a tiny, tiny brushstroke and the huge picture which is incredibly liberating. But also it makes you feel small and tiny and you're comfortable with own problems. Yeah, but that's all connected towards everything we talked about today is connects to Okay. How do I market myself? Right? How do we How do we communicate my value in context to how other people see the world? How the people I want to work with my prospects I want whatever you wanna call them. Buyers, clients, customers how they see the world. How could I connect that right? My purpose to their needs. Air values to how I show up as a blip on their radar, You know, which is what we do. We're just flips on other people's radars, even though way take ourselves so seriously, you know, agains comfortable ourselves. Yeah, and I love how we're just We're no talking with just talking about a growth under an overwhelmed from that Wu Wei kind of mindfulness perspective, but it's all connected, and it's so, so, so powerful. Definitely. So let me ask you, Joe, because you know you from your such a guiding light. And I just love every single one of our chats. But I know that you make it a point to say that you yourself work with coaches and, you know, people inspire you. Stuff inspires you. And it's always a journal made away where you are in that journey, right? Yeah. Who do you look for? Look to for inspiration and guidance to keep you grounded in your working life?
spk_1:
34:27
Yeah. Gosh, I mean, so many people. I think one of the one of the kind of leading people at the moment for me, that I keep looking too, is I don't if you've you've come across them. But gay Hendricks, who is a fantastic coach on DH, kind of, you know, into the kind of psychology of things. And so his one of his books in particular the Big League, is yes, amazing too May. So talking about this idea of the upper limit problem, which really is what I see showing up in in the people I work with constantly and not just my work with that kind of everybody myself included thiss idea that we're kind of we've kind of had again, based on the beliefs that we have created generally before the age of seven, we put this ceiling on ourselves. We we limit ourselves on, we decide that you know that I'm only really worthy off this amount ofthe wealth, health, success, freedom, joy, abundance, you know, whatever it is that you want to call it, we kind of have decided what are upper limit is on DH. When we start to feel in any aspect of our life, like things are are going well for us, then Often we can start to sabotage and ourselves to kind of bring us back down to Earth a little bit on to keep our keep our world in the box that we have created for it. And so the work that gay Hendricks does is is all around being able to really identify, I suppose what you were just talking about, Nicole, you're kind of zone of genius. This this coming together off a need that the world has that of your own skills of what you love of what is is really authentic to you on Not about just something that you know anybody else could do on being able to really kind of transcend into this zone of genius. I like to think of my my zone a genius as this beautiful spiral staircase that is out in the open air. So, you know the idea that at one point I was living inside this box that I had created for myself in this box that so many of us live inside. But actually, now I'm kind of really choosing to step out of that box and two to, you know, take each step up this beautiful spiral staircase that's just out in nature, out in the open air, and I can see that the sky and the clouds and nature around May to keep moving up to try and break through that limit that I put on myself. Probably a very young age. So yet the work of gay Hendricks is definitely inspiring me at the moment. But then you know, a CZ well, the kind of names that often come out bring a brown and thinking less that authenticity and vulnerability. I mean, for me orthodontist ears, absolutely key to Teo any business. That is certainly why I employees higher work with anybody else. When I spot, they're real authenticity. And when I spot the fact that they are just genuinely themselves, and that that then being themselves is a really amazing and powerful thing, then that's what brings me the Connexion. And so that's certainly how I like to show up in in my business and in my life is is with that authenticity invulnerability that burn a brown talks about so beautifully. Um, I mean I've mentioned Brendan Birch are too is ah, high performance coach and the planner that I use of his, particularly when we're talking about things like productivity and building that confidence through really getting a line to to our core values and the competence that we have in it. Ah, he's he's really great to follow on that. But, I mean, there's just there's so many people, obviously, that we could talk about who who are inspiring. I certainly have. I'm one of those people who has a a massive bookshelf for years to have amazing books that I'm still looking out and thinking. Oh, yeah? Still gonna read that one? You
spk_0:
38:57
gotta read that one. I just saw this catch you and I have to share with you. I think it was Instagram into the unions, and it was like someone just putting the book on the shelf from on anything said me coming from a bookstore with a new book. Kind of thinking. I'm going to get to you soon, right? You're going to ruin it. Manic street. And then all the other books collectively think just more lies. Yes, yes,
spk_1:
39:18
I know, I know. Oh, my gosh, that's so many. And now because I've got a the Kindle as well. So I got in there a swell. I'm like, Oh, my gosh. Weather even start. Oh, yeah. I mean, I always have one on the go, you know, And it is just about kind of slowly getting through them all and again and not not just ising myself for not for not doing that thing. No, adding that as just another pressure on myself that I must you know, I still haven't read that book that I should read. Ultimately, I will pick Pick that book up off the bookshelf. Where? Just drive. Yes. Yeah, absolutely. On DH. So, you know, I completely believe in that. But it is, You know, it's lovely to have them all there knowing that yeah, at any moment, I
spk_0:
40:03
could defend some inspiration. And it's not hoarding if its books write books and never this never hoarding. So that's like a firm believer I hold very dear. Yeah, you've
spk_1:
40:16
got strong belief going on then. E, But I like it. I think that belief is serving you so well. Let it stay.
spk_0:
40:23
Okay. Okay. So on with the tenable advice here, and we want, you know, listening t just take away and make come true from themselves. Yeah, right now, what's your biggest tip? Or if you have more than one than share more than one? Yeah, entrepreneurs who are feeling the old one.
spk_1:
40:43
Yeah, I think you know that Kind of the overriding kind of crux of it is Teo really do that that mindset work. Do the work on your own mindset because that is where that is, where your business is either going to succeed or fail. I mean, ultimately, your success in life and therefore in business is is about what's going on in your own mind, your own heart, your own body, muchmore than any sort of you know, What do I need to do the actual you know, process or how do we need to do it? The knowledge of doing it, It's it's it's that ria why behind it, that is, that is important on DH. So from that I suppose I'd say, as we've said, become aware of your real core driving values on make sure that the business you're creating and that you're growing is completely aligned to those values. Because if you're feeling any overwhelm, it could be that there is some mis alignment with the things that you value most. And so the reason you're not moving forward on something is because ultimately, your mind and body knows that that thing is not really, really important to you. Your mind and body knows that if you move forward on that thing, that it's the titties gonna leave you feeling unfulfilled on DH. Therefore, it's putting blocks in your way. So being really aware of your your core values and then, as we said earlier on, I think a massive one is to recognise that self talk to recognise the the inner voice, the words that you're saying to yourself you know, even is in a kind of practical sense of, you know, carry a note, pad around with you, or open up a note app on your phone on DH. Note down any self talk that you find yourself having that you think potentially could be limiting you. So I can't do that. I'm not good at that. I don't have you know this or I don't have that or it's just this or I'm, too, that you know anything where I suppose you know what we refer to as the ego is really coming into play and trying Teo to talk to you potentially. Khun Khun B limiting us so get it all written down. Get it all out off your head on. Then start to really look at it on DH. Recognise how that could be holding you back so you can start to ask yourself. Well, what else could be true? What can I now feed back in to my mind on each time this self taught comes up this limiting self talk Can I just calmly accept and kind of go? Okay, right, thanks to that. But actually, I'm going to choose something different. I'm going to commit to choosing something that empowers me on that. That thing that empowers me is on. Then you give it the new the new talk. I mean, you know, as a coach myself, I'm always going to say, get yourself a coach because if you have never been coached, then you know this will absolutely rock your world. It is is
spk_0:
43:47
a visit to that? Yeah, that's kind of Wu can look in any form that those people who have coaches I were coaches. I we have Everything's weird. Yeah, and so I'm I'm totally like I'm if if you lost a lot off well, opportunities, I'm gonna say, Yeah, that's because you know I wouldn't change a thing. It's coming to me where it's got me to wear mouth But I'm looking at it from a brand new scent point. So I realise it takes a village. And if you're by yourself working all by your lonesome just only get you that far. Yeah, getting a coach on board could be something as simple as you know, just bouncing ideas off safely changes your world blow, it will blow you blow your mind. Definitely.
spk_1:
44:34
Yeah. I mean, you know, the work that I do with people specifically around their mindset is you know, all this stuff I'm talking about about, you know, helping them to really understand what their values are, aligning their lives to their values and to recognise and reframe the self taught to look at the habits that they've got themselves into. On particularly no, I love working with entrepreneurs and, you know, especially I work with with a lot of female entrepreneurs who who do have those self doubts and that impostor syndrome and the fascination showing up on DH and having somebody else to be able to teo us the right questions to reflect things back to champion you, but also to challenge you. Also, to really call you out on, you know, any bullshit that you're telling yourself that is clearly holding you back, you know, to really helping you get out of your own way. It's It's something that, as I've said a number of times, even me being a coach, I will always have my own coaches because I 100% know the value in it. It has helped me toe to create the business that I have the life that I have, which is, you know, I if I think, you know, 10 years ago, five years ago, I couldn't have ever quite dreamed. Um, the life and the business that I have now, Um, yeah, it sits them. It's just amazing. An amazing place to bay.
spk_0:
46:02
I absolutely agree. And I love that you you know that we made that like, a like a really valid point here and mention it in that way. Um, one final thing I'd like to just, you know, bounce off. You basically is that I became like you know when you grow as you on your journey. Whatever came really aware ofthe we talked about this being like everything being connected. Is it? As you step into your own as you and you mentioned, there's no. So what kind of stress that one more time It is you that if you if you are an entrepreneur, but you work in the business that's not really aligned with your values, your core values, there's like a missile. I'm like a disconnect between what you do, whatever that ISS and your job description here. Andi, what you were born to do, what your purpose is that itself could be such a massive roadblock that keeps you from from bliss basically right from business bliss and building this business brilliance also. Yeah. On the other hand, if you like step out pivot, change lanes, whatever that means for you and you get it, get to that point where you feel what you do serves you on that level. There's a line with your values aligned with your meaning that that will reflect not just in the way you show up for yourself. We will also massively reflect well, that's what it was like for me in the way that people react to you. You will start attracting people who are such such an amazing fit. I just feel like they've been waiting for you. You've been waiting for them to show up in your life, and then you will at the same time, um, repel people who are not a great fit saving yourself and them the time it would have taken you to find that out on a later stage,
spk_1:
47:44
completely like I'm literally just sat here with a massive smile on my face because that's exactly how I feel about it on. That's kind of going back to what I was talking about with the authenticity is just through, you know, for May my business. You know, I've been coaching now for almost 10 years, most of it in education, and now, you know, with my own kind of private business with clients around the world on DH. So
spk_0:
48:09
there's been lots of changes
spk_1:
48:10
and pivots on DH movement and growth on DH trying different things. But really, when you hit a point where you have become so aligned to the wider meaning, the vision, the purpose, yeah, it just becomes a path that is feels so much lighter. And yes, Andi. Easier tow walk on DH, you know, and more beautiful and filled with light. And mostly because a lime and laughter Yeah. Yeah, it really is. And as you said, I just now almost very, very naturally. Just I'm giving off the energy where I tracked back my absolute dream clients without having to do too much kind of hard working on actually finding them. They just seem to find me, or I'm just drawn to them on a gay And those people, you know, you and I was saying earlier about sending out kind of e mail news.
spk_0:
49:12
I was just Yeah, baby. But before we press record, guys, we talked about, you know, just homesteaders and just say, you know, CEO tests you have known business. And we both said that what we found is weird and where basically helps us get better at what we do. That's what it is, right, Joe, is that we as readers ofthe SS private ourselves, we realise a lot of people sent out newsletters and you feel like the on ly reason. They show up in your in box because I want to sell you something kind of guide you towards that sale. And that's not what I want to do. Like, that's not me. And I feel like that The way I show up for the people who wanna hear from me who want to read for me who you know, connect with me online is such a different way of looking at things. And it's it's led to such deep connexions that I couldn't ever like, even dreamed off, you know, years back. So so that such such an amazing thing, Because I'm authentic like me. And I feel like the people who meet that who need what I have to offer are, you know, just responding to that. Yeah, yeah, definitely So So, like it. Sze blown my mind in terms ofthe I've always had a hard time. I felt like I've had criticised for that. Well, not just fellow was criticised on. I felt like that something Okay, I need to learn, even though I'm no gradually learning it, but I need to learn to sell, and I never felt comfortable doing that. I feel comfortable showing up for free if a country coffee hours every week on if a country with a lot of things, I never felt comfortable selling. And then I realised that serving beats selling on every single level always, and that's something that feels so comfortable to me. Like if you comfortable showing up and giving it my all and sharing what I learned and, you know, just helping. Even if effort, like once in a while, person inspecting me, saying, Gosh, you make my life better and that that whatever right could beat anything on that just I would carry that around with me for weeks, right? So I just feel like again serving beats selling on every single level. And it's worked so beautiful for me now feels so at peace with it. Yeah, and we both said that earlier, before you ever pressed record, we talked about that. Andi. I think that's you know, that's that's your wonderful maybe sentiments to wrap up today's session is how your work as a mindset coach, it connects even quote unquote to something like what I do, which is, you know, business strategy and it's all connected and it's every little thing we talk about every every time we checked. We catch each other saying, Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes, right. You're like, Oh, yeah, yeah. You're smiling Listening to you You just said the same thing. And I was like, Oh, gosh, this is how it's also beautifully connected. Yeah, yeah, because
spk_1:
52:01
ultimately, you know, we're all human beings. We all kind of, you know, trying to make our way through this crazy thing called life and oh, yeah, and work out the you know, the best way to do it for ourselves, for the people around us for, you know, for the planet on DH on DH. So it is amazing that, for example, you know, all the the different clients that I have in massively different fields and different ages and from different backgrounds. But the similarities that we all face, you know, the things that really kind of connect us and bring us all together Just just show up time and time again.
spk_0:
52:41
Yes, Absolutely. Okay, guys, this has been a long one. I don't plan on cutting anything out because I think it's all been so beautifully. Thank you so so so much Joe for joining me today. It's been so lovely chatting with you. Thank
spk_1:
52:56
you, Niko. It's been fantastic.
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